My wife recently began a new job that requires her to work every other weekend, leaving just my daughter Ahrin and me at home. While some have expressed concern about my ability to manage parenting duties along with my job, these weekends have actually been refreshing for me. I’ve discovered a sense of mental clarity.

Before Ahrin

Life before Ahrin was a constant whirlwind. My mind was always racing, and I was often overwhelmed by overthinking. This trait, while having its pros and cons, made it difficult to truly unwind during weekends or off-business hours. Even when spending time with my wife, I’d find myself constantly reaching for my phone, either for work-related matters or to engage in some form of learning.

After Ahrin

My tendencies of overthinking and doing something didn’t change immediately after Ahrin was born, but then came the guilt of not being fully present as a father. Her big, toothless smile whenever I approached her or our eyes met became a gentle reminder, prompting me to distance myself from my phone and other things that occupied me gradually.

Then, with my wife’s new job, our parenting dynamic shifted. Now, it’s just me and Ahrin on weekends, and my schedule revolves around her. She’s been waking up between 2 and 4 AM now that she’s around four and a half months old. Despite not getting enough sleep, I feel much better on weekdays after our weekends together.

What Changed:

What’s different now? The weekends that used to be filled with worries about investments and career growth are now centered around feeding, playing, and cleaning and sanitizing the bottles when she naps. These seemingly mundane tasks have become a source of immense joy and fulfillment. The sight of her giggling (and even crying) washes away any stress, and even her cries are endearing from my perspective.

Watching her peacefully nap on the baby monitor, I’ve made a conscious effort to put my phone and computer aside. It’s like meditation—just as you focus on your breath, I focus on my baby. This simple shift has not only made me feel happier but also brought a sense of peace and clarity, making me ready to tackle the week ahead with a calm mind.

Feeling Grateful

Despite the significant changes in my personal and professional life, which have often left me feeling stressed and uncertain, these past weeks with Ahrin have taught me a valuable lesson. I’ve learned to let go of the things beyond my control and focus on cherishing what I have. The support of my family and friends has been instrumental in this journey of personal growth, and I’m truly grateful for it.

All that overthinking about productivity and finances was counterproductive. Meeting Eunji and Ahrin has been the best thing that has happened in my life, and I need to spend more quality time with them, staying present in the moment instead of being distracted.

This doesn’t mean I’ll stop learning or working towards financial stability, but it does mean I need to reassess my priorities and find a better balance.